pity party

It's just one big pity party around here. Sometimes it is remarkably easy to feel sorry for yourself. At least I find that is. The last couple of weeks Brennan has had to put more hours in at work than normal. The other day he figured out that excluding weekends, he spends an average of 2 to 3 wakeful hours at home every day. That's not very many. :( His more frequent absence has made it easy for me to feel very lonely. And when it rains it pours. Or rather when you start feeling sorry for yourself you tend to think of plenty of reasons as to why a pity party is deserved. To add to all my crummy feelings of the week, I decided to head to a Church activity tonight. Don't ask me why, because I usually leave those feeling more depressed than before I went. Tonight was no different...except for my drive home. I started thinking about the conversation I had with my sister yesterday. We talked about how lucky we truly are. How it's so easy to complain about all the little things, or to feel sad that things aren't exactly the way we want them, but so many people in this world don't even have the basics or the essentials in their lives. We mostly discussed physical needs like food, water, and shelter. But what about a loving family or faith in a Heavenly Father? We really are so blessed. But we become so accustomed to our many blessings, that we stop seeing them. Today I had a speech kiddo tell me that he had a birthday this week. As I asked him questions about it I discovered that he received no presents and had no party. I have had such an easy and good life that I cannot even imagine what it would feel like to not GET things for my birthday, to not have an elaborate party as a child. But for this student, it's just life. He has to wear the same few outfits to school over and over again and he has shared some not-so-pleasant things about his home life. And here am I being all "woe is me" because I don't have many friends and I don't see my husband as much as I would like. I think it's time for an attitude change, Rachel.

I am blessed. And I am happy.
Goodnight.